Nothing is more important than your health

Whilst working in the corporate sector, Karen experienced extreme physical and mental effects of burnout. She reflects on her symptoms and how she moved towards a brighter future.

 

I’ve always placed a strong emphasis on work. My career was the most important part of my life for years, with a lot of my identity tied up in my work achievements. In 2018, I relocated to Singapore, running our Singapore and Hong Kong offices alongside my managing director (MD). I was working in senior level operations, delivering large-scale learning programmes to multinational corporations. This meant long hours, very busy days, and too much work for one person.

When COVID-19 hit in 2020, we secured two very large contracts that demanded even longer and very antisocial hours. I had to recruit and train a whole new team. I was not only the key contact for demanding clients, but the key sponsor for our two large contracts, as well as running business as usual.

COVID-19 blurred the line between work and my personal life even more. I felt pressured to be on call and available all the time. My main client stakeholders were based in the United States, so from Singapore’s timezone, it was impossible to manage without working around the clock: midnight meetings, then back online first thing the next morning.

"Even though I asked for support, it wasn’t forthcoming. People can say the right words, but if support isn’t practically there, then it makes no difference.

I couldn’t see any way out and continued to plough on."

– Karen

The first sign that something was really wrong was when I started having nosebleeds, which I’d never experienced before, even as a child. I was due to go on annual leave, so I worked even harder for that last week trying to get everything done. The night before I was due to go back to work, I had so much anxiety and realised I couldn’t go back. My boss told me to take another week off.

During this time, I started experiencing a full-blown burnout; brain fog, depression, forgetfulness, anxiety, lack of desire to interact with people, isolation, low confidence, feeling a lack of purpose and positivity about the future. Alongside these I had physical effects of chronic fatigue, low iron levels, a bacterial infection, horrendous nosebleeds. I slept a huge amount and could hardly walk down the stairs.

"I ended up taking seven weeks off work, then went backwards and forwards with taking time off or working part-time before eventually going back to full-time.

I’d changed so much during the burnout process that I could never connect with my job again."

– Karen

Recovering involved doctor’s appointments, tests, iron infusions, antibiotics, and an operation to remove a lump from my nose. I overhauled my diet, cutting out basically anything that is considered inflammatory. I couldn’t do a lot of exercise due to chronic fatigue, but I did swimming and yoga. My company also paid for me to see a therapist. I built new habits and approaches to work, and a coach helped me to work out what I really wanted for my future.

After six months of on-and-off recovery, I left my career and life in Singapore. I lived in Bali and Thailand for a year, building my coaching business and doing things that I’d wanted to do for many years, but couldn’t because of work.

"Now, I live a very different life. I still work hard but in a way that works for me, without long hours. I’m much healthier. I know what I need to do to keep my stress levels low.

I spend much more time with friends and family, and doing activities, like yoga, which bring me joy."

– Karen

Burnout plays out differently for each person. However, I believe burnout builds up for many years before a final event or phase triggers breaking point. Our body gives us so many signs that something is not right, but we often ignore them because of how we’ve been brought up or our usual patterns.

I’d urge anyone experiencing chronic stress to stop and get support, whether that’s from a professional, mentor, friend, or family member. Sometimes it takes a third party to make us realise what’s going on, to help us take action. There’s no shame in that.

I’d urge employers to speak to employees who seem stressed on an ongoing basis. Create an environment where people can ask for support, where that’s seen as a strength and not a weakness. Maybe if I’d spoken more to friends and family, or been offered support earlier, I wouldn’t have reached burnout.

Nothing is more important than your health and no job is worth risking it for. Burnout can take years to recover from. I’m not the same person since, which is a great thing, but it’s taken a lot of work to get here.

Want to know more about burnout?

Read our latest Burnout Report and access helpful insights and resources for employees and employers.

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